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January 20, 2010

Bosses Can Be In The Terrible Twos Too!!!!

An article in Psychology Today brought some memories of bosses I liked and some I didn't like at all.

One boss eventually got to be too much for me. She entered my office and was cussing and irritable, very little to do with me. I opened my drawer and took out my purse and without saying anything I started walking past her to the door. She turned and watched me walking and asked "Where are you going?" I answered "I won't work where someone talks like that to me. I quit".

Years later at a different job a boss basically told me to set someone up to get fired. She told me what she wanted me to do and to document it each time I was supposed to write up the employee. I refused to do it and found myself out of the good graces of my boss who was the manager of the firm. Oh well.

Ten years later I contacted that same company for a job to tide me over till I retired and management had changed there so I was optimistic about returning. The job I would be doing this time was not what I did previously. I would not be a supervisor, which was what I wanted. Not a lot of responsibility but just get paid to do my job. It turned out to be the worst experience with a boss of my entire working life. The boss was the cruelest, most dysfunctional of anyone I had been around. I had started attending meetings for codependency right before I started that job. I felt the need to increase the meetings to three a week to help get me through the destruction that went on in that place. My recovery was certainly being challenged each work day. I lasted a year and a half and then quit so we could move here.

The boss at my last job here in this town in Nebraska was the best boss ever. So when I retired a few months ago I said good bye to a wonderful person who encouraged the employees and was a natural leader. I miss her and I am thankful that my last work experience was with her.

23 comments:

Ronda Laveen said...

I have been a chief (boss) many times and and Indian (employee) many times. I agree that there are as many bosses who abuse their positon and take advantage of their employess as there are employees who abuse their employers and take advantage of ther bosses.

I think I would have loved to be either your boss or your employee. Kudos, TB.

Eternally Distracted said...

I have many similar experiences... I find now that it works best to arrive at work, put my headphones on and spent the day mastering the art of ignoring people ;0)

Brian Miller said...

bosses make all the difference int he world when it comes to how much you appreciate your job and how long you stay. personally i want one that will tell me how i am doing and treat me with respect.

Beth said...

Right on! I have bosses... and I am a boss - and I try to always be caring and compassionate toward my employees. It is no fun when I have to meet with someone to correct a behavior. Some employees never forgive me.

I've been corrected and I appreciate my bosses coming to me (whether I agree with them or not isn't the question). I think I have a really great relationship with my bosses and most of my employees.

Kathy M. said...

A good or bad boss sure can make the difference in a job. I've had both, and both have taught me something. Thanks for the link. I love "Psychology Today."

DJan said...

I loved my boss, and we worked well together for thirty years until I retired. But he could be a tyrant. When we was like that, I went over his head to his wife and she would always straighten him out. :-)

Lou said...

The hightest compliment I want my employees to pay me as a boss is that I won't ask them to do anything I won't do (I'm a supervisor at a hospital). In 30 years, I have worked under all sorts of directors and they can make or break morale in the workplace.

blueviolet said...

I've been fortunate that I haven't had any horror stories with bosses. But then again, I got married really young and stopped working. My worst may be in front of me.

Margie said...

Gosh, you have had some terrible bosses!
But how nice that your last one was so awesome!

Oh, enjoy your retirement!
Lucky you!

Margie:)

Ina in Alaska said...

I only work part time now and really like it. Our office manager, however, is a tantrum throwing, bitchy diva. I wish she would die. True story.

Big Dave T said...

I have many bosses--good, bad and in between. Thankfully the bad ones have been few. I'll take the one I've got right now till I retire. He's good most days, in-between the others.

cinner said...

You know good bosses are hard to find, definaately the good ones that stick out, I have found over the years that company politics plays such a huge part in who they sometimes become. The good ones make up for the bad!

otin said...

I have had 3 bosses. I have had only one boss that I liked!

Julie said...

Yet another thing we have in common! I have so many bad boss stories (and almost even posted one this week). Your bad bosses are horrible!

Two of my bosses were the worst. They were also the owners of the company. They were rich but made their employees work in hideous conditions. There were huge rats in the break room. We breathed fumes every day, because they would not buy fume hoods to cover the vats of waste (it was an environmental remediation company...oh, the irony). The heater broke, so there was NO HEAT in our office...and we were in Ohio. I learned how to type with gloves on. That was just a year ago. In the USA!! I kept going to work, because I was in a very rural area, and there were no jobs. I agree that some employers do take advantage of people in hard economic situations. I finally quit that hell hole to move where I am now.

Now, for the good boss. Her door was always open if I had a question or problem. But she felt secure enough in her talents as a leader to not micromanage. Her motto was that she "hired good people and trusted them to do their jobs." She gave credit where it was due but did not like brown nosing. Thank God for her, or I would have thought all bosses are evil. Sorry for my long-winded rant. This one struck a chord:)

Eileen said...

Oh, I'm glad your last work experience was a good one! And good for you speaking up and having the courage of your convictions!

I haven't worked a lot in my life, I worked for two years before I got married and I loved my boss! That was forty years ago and we still get together once a year for lunch! She's 82 now.
And then when my youngest was about ten or eleven I went back to work as a Teacher's Aide in a Kindergarten class, and the teacher I worked with was wonderful! And so was the principal and everyone else in that school, we were like one big family. I worked there until I left to take care of my parents.

Sorry you had to get a few bad apples! That has to be horrible to face each morning knowing what lies ahead of you each work day!

All the best,
Eileen

Lori said...

I could not imagine having a boss that would ask you to do things like this or treat you like this. How do these people end up being bosses?

Shrinky said...

I so agree with Ronda, I have witnessed the destruction some mis-appointed Chiefs can wreak in their wake. With power comes responsibility, sadly it also sometimes grants a bully carte blanche to completely demolish others, simply because they can. Luckily, most folk gain promotion due to their leadership and motivational skills, and realise the value of a little appreciation and the odd pat on the back.

I'm glad you experienced the latter kind of boss in your last position.

Yousei Hime said...

I keep telling my youngest that he is going to have to deal with all kinds of people in life. (He dislikes most of his teachers.) I guess he'll just have to find out the hard way. Most of my bosses have been relatively easy to work for. It's the husband that's challenged my will to get along. ;)

Holly said...

Dear TechnoBabe:
I'm responding to your request to send my blog about grief on to a friend. I'd be honored. If I can help more, let me know how...

As to how long it takes me to edit? Not very. When I sit still and Spirit wishes to speak, I simply type and take dictation. This piece was one of those times.

Light & Love,
Holly

Joanna Jenkins said...

It's hard to understand why people can't make the workplace more pleasant. There always seems to be someone stirring the pot. It can make things so miserable.

I'm glad your last job was for a good boss!

xo

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I have had some horribly dysfunctional bosses, and very few of the other kind. I was a supportive boss when in a position of authority, and never asked anyone to do something which I wouldn't do myself. I'm glad you got to experience working with someone who gave you the respect you deserved. In my experience, it's very rare.

Little Ms Blogger said...

I think people can really appreciate a boss until they have the one from hell.

I had one that made me cry EVERY DAY for a year. I needed the job and eventually word got back at how cruelly she was treating me that SHE got fired.

terri said...

Your last boss sounds much like my current boss. Everyone in our department feels lucky to be there. No one wants to leave. She is a natural motivator and is constantly spreading enthusiasm and encouragement. Bosses like that are rare and those of us who get to work for them are so lucky.