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She had just turned seventeen years old. She had been a ward of the court for five years and was now legally declared an adult. She was to move out of the current foster home and learn to take care of herself. Without a car, a job, or a roof over her head, she was unable to begin the self care phase. Her mother was living 1000 miles away and sounded stable and calm the last time they spoke on the phone. With no other choices available, she called her mother and asked if she could try to live with her. If she moved in with her mother, she would finish the last semester of high school in the city near her mother's job. An agreement was reached and the mother drove south to pick up the newly declared adult woman and her few possessions.
She had no problem registering in school. She didn't need to take many classes for her final semester in order to graduate, so she spent time working in the school office when she wasn't in a class. This school was larger and the buildings were older and three stories compared to the newer single level sprawling southern school.
With ambivalent feelings, she familiarized herself with the class locations and mentally mapped a strategy for stops at the locker to exchange books and supplies.
Her third day of school she followed the now familiar trek from the top floor classroom to the crowded stairway. Down she trudged, holding tightly to the books and watching the faces of students ascending as they pushed and jostled each other. She didn't know anyone but she didn't feel lonely.
Then into her vision a boy made his way past her and their eyes met briefly. When she reached the last step she raised her head and looked up through the opening to the very top of the stairs. He had reached the top and turned to look down at the exact same moment. Two Mona Lisa smiles.
24 comments:
This sounds like something lived because it made me really feel for the young woman, to wonder about her mother's issues that caused her to be in foster care for five years, and to want very much to learn more about her and her story. Will there be more about her?
Soooo many questions!! I am sure there will be more though, right??!
This most definitely rings with truth. Perhaps the young girl will discover life is full of second chances? Or that the future can be quite different than the past..
love this story...kindred hearts passing in the night...more, more.
Technobabe aka my "twin,"
Thanks for your comment on my blog. I'm glad you're the best you've ever been. Me too.
This is a great post. I want to read more!
Love the title of your story and also the story!
Ah, "Two Mona Lisa smiles"
Maybe the beginning of something wonderful in two young lives?
I hope you will share more!
Have a great Monday ....hugs!
There are so many kids who find a strong connection with someone at school. I want him to be a good connection.
I wonder which one you are, if any. Or if this is a story that we will know more about. Very tantalizing little tidbit here!
A connection! Zing! xoxo
So much more to be said, very nice,,, I left you an award on my blog today. Take care.
We're all thinking the same thing. What happens next. No, just for a moment, think about this. You are a great writer. Although this is written in a sort of abstract third person, I would say it is a perfect beginning for a novel just as it is. It's a quick little prologue. Then start the novel from just prior to when this girl was given up or lost by her mother, through this point and into a resolution with the boy and, hopefully, ultimately, her mother. This is excellent. I hope you do something with it. (I've written five novels, which doesn't make me an expert, but I do believe I recognize good stuff.)
Cheers,
SLC
It sounds like there may be some personal experience woven into the beginning of this story. Please let us hear more.
I hope they are as good for each other as it seems. Well told and intriguing, TechnoBabe.
Oh, it sounds like the beginning of something wonderful!
I just stopped by to thank you for your Birthday wishes! Sweet!
All the best,
Eileen
My heart did a somersault at the recollection of those kinds of feelings.
Beautifully expressed.
More, please!
love it!!! I can actually relate!! I had been on my own since I was 14, in & out of group homes/foster..met my (now husband) when I was 16 & have been with him ever since.. :) (I thought I'd share that with you anyway, just so ya know I did not really have a "carefree" youth, I just meant carefree, free of bills, crying babies etc!) LOL :D
Please tell us more! Beautiful but I want to know more! :) Please.
ah. a flash. a spark. two kindred souls. does this continue? that would be really nice!
Love it - true story?
Love that song BTW
sure hope you continue the story.
Fiction or real life? I am thinking that the young girl might be someone we all know?
Oh young love!!! Can't wait to here more!!
Me too, want to know more!
This broke my heart! I am crying! It feels real to me, too, because the system would do something like this. I've seen it happen. But mostly, it's because your writing is excellent. Just wonderful. You have soul, and your words breathe. If you are in the story, I want to put my arms around you and hug you. If you aren't in the story, I still want to hug you for having so much heart. I want to know more, too. The ending was just what I wanted to read. I want good things to happen to the girl. Awesome work!
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