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November 14, 2006

The Different Faces of Thee and Me

Do we wear a different face for each person we encounter?

People at work, neighbors, friends, and family expect to see what they think is normal for each of us. When I feel someone is expecting something from me, I back off and look at the situation and the overall picture. I spent too many years trying to be what other people wanted me to be and during the past five years I have been on an amazing adventure while getting to know myself.

From Emotional Intelligence:
"Emotional honesty means expressing your true feelings. To be able to be emotionally honest we must first be emotionally aware. This emotional awareness is related to our emotional intelligence. It is our emotional intelligence which gives us the ability to accurately identify our feelings."
{...}
"If we are more emotionally honest with ourselves we will get to know our "true selves" on a deeper level. This could help us become more self-accepting. It could also helps us make better choices about how to spend out time and who to spend it with.

If we are emotionally honest with others, it may encourage them to be more emotionally honest. When we are emotionally honest we are more likely not to be asked or pressured to do things which we do not want to do. We will also find out sooner who respects our feelings.
"

One of the characteristics I admire about my sweet boyfriend is that he is the same everywhere, with everyone.

He doesn't put on an act. He isn't trying to impress anyone. He is open and sincere and genuine. And honest.
"Our lives improve only when we take chances - and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves."
Quote by Walter Anderson

Good advice.

3 comments:

carina said...

E.H. is important, sure...but I dunno about neighbors & coworkers & people we meet or know casually. The meaningless (yet well-meaning) little public exchanges we have every day - how are you, have a nice day, nice to have metcha - have a good social function, keep people courteous and so on....the woman at the gas station doesn't want to know how I REALLY feel! Haha.
Oh I am sure that's not what you meant! It's 4 am, I didn't sleep well and I'm on my first cup of coffee. Yes, one can't have a great relationship with people close to you without being honest. My ex was pathologically dishonest (which is why he's my ex) and over time it just became unbearable. Really confusing and difficult way to live!

Anonymous said...

Good morning Carina. You get up an hour before I do. And I am the same way, function so much better after the second cup of coffee.

I know what you mean about it being so confusing living with someone who lies. My ex lied about so much, even little things. When you are with someone who lies so much things become blurred and it affects your daily life too.

So when I say I appreciate the honesty in my sweet boyfriend, you understand why that is so important. You know that commercial where the woman asks him if her butt looks fat in that dress and he doesn't know how to answer? I can count on an honest answer to that and in such a way that I know it is just being honest and not done to hurt me. Kinda like a real grownup relationship.

Have a great day! Thanks for stopping by.

Carina said...

He sounds like a keeper for sure - I've checked out his blog too, it's good & I should check in more often.
Yah I'm an extreme morning person, sometimes I am ready for lunch by 9 am haha!